Part 2: Road to Sicily with George Clooney & Elisabetta Canalis

Back again so soon, you say? Well, yes, we were too excited not to post about our first celebrity road trip. And where are we going?

As we all know George Clooney is currently dating Elisabetta Canalis, a gorgeous Italian actress, who must be somewhat amazing to have kept George for such a long time, right? And where should these two gorgeous, interesting and charming people take us? Why to Sicily, of course. Clooney and Canalis would love this trip as well as they're probably always at his magnificent villa on Lake Como, which is so very far away from the island of mythical Sicily. Plus, Mr. Fashionista and I will have someone to translate for us. Perfect!



1. Palermo.

George has agreed to pick up the car at the airport and drive us through Palermo. Thank god because we've heard driving in Palermo ages you in two days as badly as the first six months of being President does. First things first guys, let's grab a cappucino. Now caffeinated, George decides to drop Elisabetta and I off at La Viccuria, a souk-style market, while Mr. Fashionista  and he run off to play bocce ball. Elisabetta (she's letting me call her Betty now, by the way) and I have a blast, buying all sorts of tchotchkes for our homes which we will never use (although she seems a bit high maintenance IMHO) and George is so gracious that he lets Mr. Fashionista win bocce ball.

Monreale Cathedral

We are, of course, starving at this point, so we head off for lunch at Antica Focacceria San Francesco. All of us decide to try the many different types of street food there, which Palermo is so well known for. After our meal, we are all a bit lethargic, and George offers to drive us all to Monreale Cathedral, famous for its Greek and Byzantine mosaics.

We then drive back to the city and Elisabetta lets me sit in the front with George so she can get more sun in the back (we're not sure any woman who puts her tan in front of her man is worth having, George). He is the most charming man on the face of the planet and I convince him that he should wear only tuxes for the rest of the trip. That evening, we all eat at tiny 10-table Bellotero. Yum. And George has shown up in a tux. Double Yum. Then we head off for some grappa afterwards and George talks to me all night about how he once stuck a "Small Penis on Board" bumper sticker on Brad Pitt's car as a prank. http://movies.ign.com/articles/571/571897p1.html. At this point, I'm sure Betty is temporary and I think Mr. F would totally understand if I left him for the Clooney.

2. Cefalu

Cefalu and "La Rocca"

Next, we all head off to the seaside town of Cefalu. We sing "100 bottiglie di birra sulla parete" on the way there. Betty has, of course, decided to wear a scarf in her hair, with big round sunglasses, she is so la dolce vita, no wonder George loves her. I hate her. Once we arrive in Cefalu, we head to the medieval apartment, which is super swank inside, which uber-stylish George and Betty have rented. Betty makes us all some martinis and we enjoy some delicious prosciutto and cheese. Betty's being kind of short with me. What's her problem?

Mrs. F's fave dessert wine: moscato

I try to ignore her glare and we all head for the beach. We laze away the day beneath La Rocca and decide we should check out the town itself tomorrow before heading to the island of Vulcano. We stroll back to town and I find my prettiest party dress for George. This evening it will be seafood followed by a moscato di noto tasting, which is, by far, my most favorite dessert wine in the world.


3. Vulcano and Stromboli

The next day, Betty and I head out to do a little shopping in town. She finds some beautiful handcrafted tile she thinks would look great in one of their homes...Show off.

I'm unbelievably jealous that Mr. Fashionista gets to spend his morning with the Clooney. Those two have become bocce ball fanatics.

Volcanic mud baths

Just as I think I can no longer tolerate Miss Canalis, Mr. Fashionista and George show up to the rescue. And insist that we must hurry or we'll miss the hydrofoil to Vulcano, one of the Aeolian Islands and famous for its therapeutic mud baths. We stay at the gorgeous Therasia Resort and head off for our respective mud treatments. Betty says she has a headache and leaves us. Seriously, what is her deal, I mean other than the fact that George is so obviously falling in love with me?

George, Mr. F and I head to the infinity pool.  George regales us with tales of his Aunt Rosemary forcing the young George to sing "Sisters" with her at his tenth birthday party to embarrass him, and then exclaims that he has a big surprise planned and that we should show up by the docks around 5; when we do, it seems he has rented an enormous yacht. Where are we going?

Fireworks of Stromboli

Betty suggests Sardinia, her home. Fabulous my foot. She's soooo provincial. George says no, we're going to Stromboli (which also happens to be a classic film featuring the gorge Ingrid Bergman)! I start jumping up and down like a child as I have been wanting to go to Stromboli for years. Stromboli, basically a super-active volcano that also calls itself an island is pretty much uninhabitable, but people go there to watch the volcano do its thing. And from a yacht, we'll have a perfect view.

We make our way over to the island around dusk. George has the yacht's chef make us a seafood risotto and we watch the spectacle. At this point, even Betty seems pleased and returns to George's side. I see Mr. Fashionista, thrilled to be on the open sea and he gives me a little smile. Awww. My sweetheart.

The next morning, George and Betty head on to Panarea, the most luxurious and exclusive of the Aeolian Islands, but not before inviting Mr. Fashionista and I to their villa on Como. We fully intend to do Christmas there from now on. We all double kiss and part ways.

And so ends our Celebrity Road Trip Number 1. Ciao.